Since I'm always talking about all the negative things that happen on the el, I thought I should mention it when something sweet happens. And sweet things DO occasionally happen. Like last night.
I was on the el when this man with two little boys got on the el. He was carrying the one year old. And told the other little boy to sit down in the seat he pointed to. But instead of sitting there the little boy went and sat next to this older man with a guitar. He put his hand on the older man's leg to help himself get up in that adorable way that only toddlers with their wee little hands and their sweetness can do.
Everyone who saw it said, "ahhh." And so seeing that the boy was interested in the guitar, he took it out and gave him an impromptu concert.
After the boy got off the el, the man was putting the guitar back inside his case, which was lined on the inside with lots of old photos. He pointed at one of them and told us that it was his wife back when she was 13 years-old. He told us that he wrote a love song about her that went something along the lines of "I first met you, when you were twelve years-old..."
And then he stopped singing and said, "Even back then she had 38 DD's and that was the first thing I noticed about her!" A fitting note for the ride to end on, because, after all, this is still the el, people.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Friday, May 28, 2010
swimsuit season
I hate it. I hate being bombarded with these ads and catalogs and magazines that make you feel crappy about your body.
I know that they sell better when they put their bikinis on these gorgeous, airbrushed women. I get that. But it doesn't mean I have to like it. Not with the amount of women that I know that have body issues. We need it to change!
I received two catalogs in the mail last week. One was from Victoria's Secret and the other was from Athleta.
This is the Victoria's Secret ad:
The women in all the ads are beautiful. And they are probably all a size zero. But look at the arms of the models in the Victoria's Secret catalog. Gross. They look anorexic. And while the models in the other catalog are also skinny, at least they have some muscle on them so that you can imagine that they got to be that thin in a healthy way instead of just starving themselves to death.
Obviously I like the Athleta catalog better simply because the women look more natural and aren't doing these sexy little pouty poses. Do you notice how the VS models have to really jut out their hips to give the appearance that they have some curves to their body?
Can we program ourselves to really tune this stuff out? What if we didn't have to see this all the time?
What if instead, we were constantly bombarded with things that made us feel better about ourselves?
I know that they sell better when they put their bikinis on these gorgeous, airbrushed women. I get that. But it doesn't mean I have to like it. Not with the amount of women that I know that have body issues. We need it to change!
I received two catalogs in the mail last week. One was from Victoria's Secret and the other was from Athleta.
This is the Victoria's Secret ad:
The women in all the ads are beautiful. And they are probably all a size zero. But look at the arms of the models in the Victoria's Secret catalog. Gross. They look anorexic. And while the models in the other catalog are also skinny, at least they have some muscle on them so that you can imagine that they got to be that thin in a healthy way instead of just starving themselves to death.
Obviously I like the Athleta catalog better simply because the women look more natural and aren't doing these sexy little pouty poses. Do you notice how the VS models have to really jut out their hips to give the appearance that they have some curves to their body?
Can we program ourselves to really tune this stuff out? What if we didn't have to see this all the time?
What if instead, we were constantly bombarded with things that made us feel better about ourselves?
this is what goes on in my head
When I ride the train, I see a lot of people reading the Bible. Somehow, that lead to me thinking of this...
the early bird...
... wakes me up!
I know some of you have heard me complain about the ridiculous birds outside my window at 4:47 in the morning. Yes, I know the exact time that they start.
Here is the view from my bedroom window and a small taste of what I get to hear. They wouldn't perform on my command!
But seriously it sounds like some sort of jungle!
I know some of you have heard me complain about the ridiculous birds outside my window at 4:47 in the morning. Yes, I know the exact time that they start.
Here is the view from my bedroom window and a small taste of what I get to hear. They wouldn't perform on my command!
But seriously it sounds like some sort of jungle!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
quiz night!
One of the perks of living in the burbs is doing little cheesy things like "Quiz Night" at the local bar. Not only are drinks incredibly cheap- I got four glasses of wine for $20!!! But the people are soooo nice.
Except for when they are kicking our butts and laughing about it!
My team was actually doing quite well until we got to the special neutralizer round. During that round, you don't HAVE to answer all the questions. You still get a point for each question you get right. But if you get a SINGLE question wrong, you get zero points for the whole round. Well, we got a single question wrong, and it is hard to bounce back from that.
The best thing that happened last night is that they actually asked some questions that I knew the answer to. Like they asked what the name of the mountain range that separates Spain from France is- well it helps that I lived in the foothills of the Pyrenees mountains for four months! Cha-ching!
Emily was a little bit late picking me up so I was reading "Useless Knowledge: Answers to questions you'd never think to ask" while waiting for her. I only read about three pages. And I was on the section about insects.
The most interesting factoid that I learned from the book was, "Spiders never spin webs in structures made of chestnut wood. That is why so many European chateaux were built with chestnut beams- spider webs on a 50-foot beamed ceiling can be hard to remove."
One of the questions on the quiz just happened to ask which type of insect has the most species. Luckily, not an hour before seeing this question I had read, "There are more beetles on Earth than any other type of creature. Within the beetle family, the number of species alone is nearly a quarter-million." What are the chances that I would have just read that?!?!
I love little things like that.
My team came in second to last place, by the way! But we had a damn good time doing it! :)
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
hot!
It's too hot to wear clothes. I'm wearing shorts and a sports bra and if it weren't for public decency, I wouldn't even be wearing that.
When I was out running I saw a girl wearing jeans and knee high boots. Don't you people check the weather report before leaving the house?
Anyways, with so little clothes on, I am showing a fair amount of flesh. I'm still not rocking quite the body that I want to be, but the contestants on The Biggest Loser would die to have my body. And that's my happy thought of the day.
When I was out running I saw a girl wearing jeans and knee high boots. Don't you people check the weather report before leaving the house?
Anyways, with so little clothes on, I am showing a fair amount of flesh. I'm still not rocking quite the body that I want to be, but the contestants on The Biggest Loser would die to have my body. And that's my happy thought of the day.
I've been hypnotised!
I had my first hypnosis session the other day. I didn't know what to expect. But I ended up loving it.
I arrived at the hypnotist's apartment and she plopped me into the comfy chair. The magical comfy chair that once you sit in, you never want to leave.
Then she sat across from me with her notepad and we talked about my life and the things I want to change and what I wanted to commit to doing.
As I talked to her, she helped me realize that I don't want a new job. About 90% of the time I am thrilled with my job and my life. What I wanted was to not let other people make me feel bad about my lifestyle choices.
That's when I get sad and depressed, when I let other people's attitudes get to me.
So not letting other people get to me was one of the first things.
Controlling my eating. Not eating from boredom. Not eating to make myself happy. Not over eating. Not eating crap.
I usually do this for a while and then slip. So we were working on the not slipping part.
Motivating myself to write was the third one. Every time I force myself to sit down and write (even when I'm not feeling inspired) I come up with something. So, really, I just need to force myself to do it. She told me about how these professional writers do the same thing and how looking back at what they had written, there was no real difference between the writing they did when they forced themselves and the writing they did when they were feeling inspired.
These are very simple things to work on with hypnosis because they all require a change in thinking, which is what hypnosis does.
I asked her how hypnosis works and she gave me a very clear and articulate answer which I will now butcher.
Basically, she said that hypnosis gets the body to a super relaxed state and then the brain waves slow down and she is able to get to my subconscious better. At that stage I am more open to suggestion.
However, I still have free will. The hypnotist can not suddenly make me do something that I don't want to do. I am awake and conscious the whole time, just very, very relaxed.
There was no swinging watch. There was no hocus-pocus.
I sat on the chair and basically she led me on a very personalized guided meditation. It starts by relaxing all the different parts of your body starting from the top of your head down to your feet. There were a few of the cliches that you would expect like "your eyelids are getting very heavy" and "I'm going to count down from five and as I go you are going to fall deeper and deeper into a state of relaxation."
But I felt motivated and great and happy afterwards. Like nothing could touch me.
It isn't a cure all. And she gave me homework to do and a mini ten minute self-hypnosis routine to do to myself daily to help continue the process. It is similar to massage where the more work you do yourself, the better the results of the massage will be, i.e., if you stretch after sitting at a computer for a few hours, you will not getting nearly as stiff and tight.
I would recommend it though. It is hard to say how much it is working but I haven't craved a cupcake or cheddar cheese in days which in and of itself is a miracle!
I arrived at the hypnotist's apartment and she plopped me into the comfy chair. The magical comfy chair that once you sit in, you never want to leave.
Then she sat across from me with her notepad and we talked about my life and the things I want to change and what I wanted to commit to doing.
As I talked to her, she helped me realize that I don't want a new job. About 90% of the time I am thrilled with my job and my life. What I wanted was to not let other people make me feel bad about my lifestyle choices.
That's when I get sad and depressed, when I let other people's attitudes get to me.
So not letting other people get to me was one of the first things.
Controlling my eating. Not eating from boredom. Not eating to make myself happy. Not over eating. Not eating crap.
I usually do this for a while and then slip. So we were working on the not slipping part.
Motivating myself to write was the third one. Every time I force myself to sit down and write (even when I'm not feeling inspired) I come up with something. So, really, I just need to force myself to do it. She told me about how these professional writers do the same thing and how looking back at what they had written, there was no real difference between the writing they did when they forced themselves and the writing they did when they were feeling inspired.
These are very simple things to work on with hypnosis because they all require a change in thinking, which is what hypnosis does.
I asked her how hypnosis works and she gave me a very clear and articulate answer which I will now butcher.
Basically, she said that hypnosis gets the body to a super relaxed state and then the brain waves slow down and she is able to get to my subconscious better. At that stage I am more open to suggestion.
However, I still have free will. The hypnotist can not suddenly make me do something that I don't want to do. I am awake and conscious the whole time, just very, very relaxed.
There was no swinging watch. There was no hocus-pocus.
I sat on the chair and basically she led me on a very personalized guided meditation. It starts by relaxing all the different parts of your body starting from the top of your head down to your feet. There were a few of the cliches that you would expect like "your eyelids are getting very heavy" and "I'm going to count down from five and as I go you are going to fall deeper and deeper into a state of relaxation."
But I felt motivated and great and happy afterwards. Like nothing could touch me.
It isn't a cure all. And she gave me homework to do and a mini ten minute self-hypnosis routine to do to myself daily to help continue the process. It is similar to massage where the more work you do yourself, the better the results of the massage will be, i.e., if you stretch after sitting at a computer for a few hours, you will not getting nearly as stiff and tight.
I would recommend it though. It is hard to say how much it is working but I haven't craved a cupcake or cheddar cheese in days which in and of itself is a miracle!
oily hair
The other day I saw this flier on the bulletin board where I work. I was intrigued. I had never heard of such a thing! I mean, it makes perfect sense. My hair soaks up oil like nobody's business!
I was looking around on the internet and found this site which helped explain it a little bit more:
http://www.squidoo.com/hair-cleans-oil-spills
But I also found a site that said that BP and the clean up crew were not using the donated hair booms because they hadn't been tested and they have their own methods and instead the donated hair booms/mats are just sitting in a warehouse.
Still an interesting idea!
technical problems!!!
Okay! Finally! I'm back. We've been having some internet problems at the house this week. And stupid iPhoto problems this morning. But I'm back!
Here's what you've missed in my exciting life while I've been away:
This is the picture of the GOLD PLATED SLINKY that I saw while killing time in a Tuesday Morning store the other day. It was originally priced at $99.99! They had it on clearance for $39.99. Somehow I found the strength to pass it up.
My sister and I walked up to the liquor store the other day, which, fyi, is VERY far away and seemed like a good idea at the time but we then had to walk all the way back home with our purchases!
The bottle in the middle is a normal sized bottle of wine. The others are obviously oversized but did you know that the bigger wine bottles have different names? Most people have heard of a "magnum" which is double the size of a regular bottle of wine. But they get much, MUCH bigger. The biggest ones are named after the kings of the Bible.
Jeroboam (sparkling wines)= 4 wine bottles (3.0L)
Reboboam (red wines)= 6 wine bottles (4.5L)
Imperial= 8 wine bottles (6.0L)
Methuselah (sparkling wines)= 8 wine bottles (6.0L)
Salmanazar = 12 wine bottles (9.0L = 1 case)
Balthazar = 16 wine bottles (12.0L)
Nebuchadnezzar = 20 wine bottles (15.0L)
So that's your fun fact for the day. Still working on these computer problems. More posts to come!
Here's what you've missed in my exciting life while I've been away:
This is the picture of the GOLD PLATED SLINKY that I saw while killing time in a Tuesday Morning store the other day. It was originally priced at $99.99! They had it on clearance for $39.99. Somehow I found the strength to pass it up.
My sister and I walked up to the liquor store the other day, which, fyi, is VERY far away and seemed like a good idea at the time but we then had to walk all the way back home with our purchases!
The bottle in the middle is a normal sized bottle of wine. The others are obviously oversized but did you know that the bigger wine bottles have different names? Most people have heard of a "magnum" which is double the size of a regular bottle of wine. But they get much, MUCH bigger. The biggest ones are named after the kings of the Bible.
Jeroboam (sparkling wines)= 4 wine bottles (3.0L)
Reboboam (red wines)= 6 wine bottles (4.5L)
Imperial= 8 wine bottles (6.0L)
Methuselah (sparkling wines)= 8 wine bottles (6.0L)
Salmanazar = 12 wine bottles (9.0L = 1 case)
Balthazar = 16 wine bottles (12.0L)
Nebuchadnezzar = 20 wine bottles (15.0L)
So that's your fun fact for the day. Still working on these computer problems. More posts to come!
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Again???
So the thing with depression is you often don't even know why you are sad. It is just, waaah, waaaah, waaah, I am so sad, look at me, waaaah. I don't know what's the matter. Waaaaah!
But today I know exactly why I am sad and that is why this is not depression, this is just having a bad day.
It didn't start off as a bad day. In fact, it was a pretty friggin' good day. I rocked all of my massages. Got to see one of my repeat clients who was just cracking me up. She was asking me if any of my clients ever annoyed me. I admitted that yes, from time to time, I had an annoying client. Then she thought about it for a second and asked me if she annoyed me. I laughed and said no. Though, I would NOT have told her the truth if she had annoyed me. She doesn't. She is great. She then told me that I am wasting my talents and wondered why I'm not a doctor. I told her that I don't like sick people. I don't like hospitals. If that makes me a bad person, then so be it. There are lots of ways to help people, being a doctor isn't the only way. Besides, stress is one of the worst things for people that there is. Doctors don't get rid of stress. I do. I bring your blood pressure down.
Anywho, my day was just rockin' away. Sara was getting ready to go to her show and I told her to go "break a femur" cuz who doesn't love a good anatomy joke!
And then I got on the train. Headed back home. Was blissfully unaware as I tucked my valuables between my legs and lost myself in my book.
I was three pages from finishing my book (still have NO idea how it ends!) when I heard this pathetic little cry.
"Give me my iphone back!" rang through the el in broken English.
This poor little Japanese woman was frantically, pathetically calling it out, over and over again, "Give me my iPhone back!"
The irony? Okay, maybe not irony, but the suckiness? It was at the VERY same el stop that I got mine stolen at.
They did the same exact thing. As the train was rolling into the station they grabbed it from the woman's hands and headed for the door.
Only...
... they didn't time it right!
And the doors weren't opening.
And the woman is getting more and more frantic.
And people are looking.
So the thieves forced the doors open and jumped from the moving train.
And the one thief was SLAMMED up against this pole!
And it was AWESOME!
But they still got up and ran away and got the phone.
But I really, REALLY hope he was seriously injured.
I don't know if it was how shooken up and sad the woman looked that got to me. Or if it is the bleakness of wondering how life for the people in the bad parts of Chicago will ever get better. Seriously, it is like the Middle East... how will we ever get peace? But it just got me feeling down.
There are lots of good people out there, right? Things can get better, right? Inner city Chicago isn't just a lost cause, right?
I need a hug.
And I need to stop riding the f'ing el.
But today I know exactly why I am sad and that is why this is not depression, this is just having a bad day.
It didn't start off as a bad day. In fact, it was a pretty friggin' good day. I rocked all of my massages. Got to see one of my repeat clients who was just cracking me up. She was asking me if any of my clients ever annoyed me. I admitted that yes, from time to time, I had an annoying client. Then she thought about it for a second and asked me if she annoyed me. I laughed and said no. Though, I would NOT have told her the truth if she had annoyed me. She doesn't. She is great. She then told me that I am wasting my talents and wondered why I'm not a doctor. I told her that I don't like sick people. I don't like hospitals. If that makes me a bad person, then so be it. There are lots of ways to help people, being a doctor isn't the only way. Besides, stress is one of the worst things for people that there is. Doctors don't get rid of stress. I do. I bring your blood pressure down.
Anywho, my day was just rockin' away. Sara was getting ready to go to her show and I told her to go "break a femur" cuz who doesn't love a good anatomy joke!
And then I got on the train. Headed back home. Was blissfully unaware as I tucked my valuables between my legs and lost myself in my book.
I was three pages from finishing my book (still have NO idea how it ends!) when I heard this pathetic little cry.
"Give me my iphone back!" rang through the el in broken English.
This poor little Japanese woman was frantically, pathetically calling it out, over and over again, "Give me my iPhone back!"
The irony? Okay, maybe not irony, but the suckiness? It was at the VERY same el stop that I got mine stolen at.
They did the same exact thing. As the train was rolling into the station they grabbed it from the woman's hands and headed for the door.
Only...
... they didn't time it right!
And the doors weren't opening.
And the woman is getting more and more frantic.
And people are looking.
So the thieves forced the doors open and jumped from the moving train.
And the one thief was SLAMMED up against this pole!
And it was AWESOME!
But they still got up and ran away and got the phone.
But I really, REALLY hope he was seriously injured.
I don't know if it was how shooken up and sad the woman looked that got to me. Or if it is the bleakness of wondering how life for the people in the bad parts of Chicago will ever get better. Seriously, it is like the Middle East... how will we ever get peace? But it just got me feeling down.
There are lots of good people out there, right? Things can get better, right? Inner city Chicago isn't just a lost cause, right?
I need a hug.
And I need to stop riding the f'ing el.
fuerza bruta
Sometimes I like to pretend that I am all artsy and cool and am a character on Sex & the City.
Who are we kidding? That's so not me. Though I do fake it pretty well though.
Like last night.
(heehee, if you just read those last two sentences together out of context, they are kind of funny)
Anywho, last night I went to see this 70 minute long performance piece where the entire audience has to stand on the stage at the Auditorium Theater and the show goes on all around and amongst and above you. Ashton Kutchner recommended it, so how could I stay away?
As an indication of what I was getting myself into, this was the coffee table out in the waiting area/ foyer. I didn't get a photo of the woman who was going around selling shots of some yummy alcoholic drink in test tubes.
To give you a tiny idea of what the piece was like, here is a short clip:
Yeah, that was on the wall.
So while interpretive dance and bizarro art installations aren't usually my thing. I have to say that I came away really happy. I can't pretend that I understood all of it, but I liked it.
Who are we kidding? That's so not me. Though I do fake it pretty well though.
Like last night.
(heehee, if you just read those last two sentences together out of context, they are kind of funny)
Anywho, last night I went to see this 70 minute long performance piece where the entire audience has to stand on the stage at the Auditorium Theater and the show goes on all around and amongst and above you. Ashton Kutchner recommended it, so how could I stay away?
As an indication of what I was getting myself into, this was the coffee table out in the waiting area/ foyer. I didn't get a photo of the woman who was going around selling shots of some yummy alcoholic drink in test tubes.
To give you a tiny idea of what the piece was like, here is a short clip:
Yeah, that was on the wall.
So while interpretive dance and bizarro art installations aren't usually my thing. I have to say that I came away really happy. I can't pretend that I understood all of it, but I liked it.
Friday, May 21, 2010
hypnosis
I'm always up for trying something new- so next week it will be hypnosis!
One of my clients does it for a living and is going to cut me a deal so I decided, "Why not?"
But she gave me a little homework to prepare for my first session.
She has asked me to,
"write down specifically what you would like to change
then write down anything that you think may be contributing to keeping you "stuck" with that problem / issue
then write down all the ways that you would benefit from letting go of that behavior"
Geez, where do I even start? And do I only get to choose one thing? It isn't like I am a smoker who is trying to quit. I was joking that I should use this to stop me from craving cupcakes all the time. Only, I'm not really joking.
What would you choose to change?
One of my clients does it for a living and is going to cut me a deal so I decided, "Why not?"
But she gave me a little homework to prepare for my first session.
She has asked me to,
"write down specifically what you would like to change
then write down anything that you think may be contributing to keeping you "stuck" with that problem / issue
then write down all the ways that you would benefit from letting go of that behavior"
Geez, where do I even start? And do I only get to choose one thing? It isn't like I am a smoker who is trying to quit. I was joking that I should use this to stop me from craving cupcakes all the time. Only, I'm not really joking.
What would you choose to change?
Thursday, May 20, 2010
I love my phone
I've decided that the best feature about the iPhone is that there is no external keyboard. The touch-screen keyboard DID take a while to get used to. I felt like I had the fattest fingers on the planet for the first few days.
But do you know why it is so great? Because when I spill water on my phone, like I did AGAIN tonight, there aren't as many cracks and crevices for the water to sneak into and so there is less of a chance of me damaging my phone! Yeah! It is still working!
But do you know why it is so great? Because when I spill water on my phone, like I did AGAIN tonight, there aren't as many cracks and crevices for the water to sneak into and so there is less of a chance of me damaging my phone! Yeah! It is still working!
paramotor
Of all the days not to have my camera phone on me!
I just went running to the park where I usually do my sprints. There were people on the tennis courts so I couldn't run there. There was a guy practicing his fly fishing and some people playing with their dogs on the soccer field but I decided there would still be enough room for me to do my sprinting without being in their way.
I was all set to go when I saw this swarm of grade school children descending upon the field from the neighboring school. They quickly took over the field and I was preparing to go on my merry way when I saw this dude, with this thing, and I was intrigued.
As I watched him unfold his equipment (and then as I eavesdropped while he talked to the children) it became clear what he was doing.
He, with just the protection of a bike helmet mind you, was going to attach himself by a harness onto a huge gasoline propelled fan and then latch a parachute to the harness and go paragliding!
As I searched for images when I got home, since I sadly did not have my camera with me, I discovered that this is actually called paramotoring.
After watching him frantically fiddle with the non-working engine for about twenty minutes, I thought about leaving, but by this time I had already invested so much time into this that I felt the need to stay to the end. Besides, I was enjoying talking to the other snarky adults who had stopped by as we determined his chances of success.
It took a while but he finally did it! He got airborne and zoomed all over the park!
I'm still not sure exactly what the point of it was and why the kids were there to watch him, but I enjoyed it, so thank you Mr. Random Paramotor Man!
I just went running to the park where I usually do my sprints. There were people on the tennis courts so I couldn't run there. There was a guy practicing his fly fishing and some people playing with their dogs on the soccer field but I decided there would still be enough room for me to do my sprinting without being in their way.
I was all set to go when I saw this swarm of grade school children descending upon the field from the neighboring school. They quickly took over the field and I was preparing to go on my merry way when I saw this dude, with this thing, and I was intrigued.
As I watched him unfold his equipment (and then as I eavesdropped while he talked to the children) it became clear what he was doing.
He, with just the protection of a bike helmet mind you, was going to attach himself by a harness onto a huge gasoline propelled fan and then latch a parachute to the harness and go paragliding!
As I searched for images when I got home, since I sadly did not have my camera with me, I discovered that this is actually called paramotoring.
After watching him frantically fiddle with the non-working engine for about twenty minutes, I thought about leaving, but by this time I had already invested so much time into this that I felt the need to stay to the end. Besides, I was enjoying talking to the other snarky adults who had stopped by as we determined his chances of success.
It took a while but he finally did it! He got airborne and zoomed all over the park!
I'm still not sure exactly what the point of it was and why the kids were there to watch him, but I enjoyed it, so thank you Mr. Random Paramotor Man!
comments
I was going to invite all my readers/guests to leave comments whenever they feel like it. I love reading people's comments. I was even going to say that they could post their comments anonymously if they felt like it.
But then I remembered back to my senior year of high school when someone anonymously gave me a box of Godiva chocolates for Valentine's day. They left them for me in my second period English class. But the kicker was that we had a substitute teacher that day, and she didn't know who left them! All she could tell me is that he was a brunette!
All I know is that they were NOT from the boy I was dating at the time! (And he was not happy when he found out about it!)
It's driven me nuts for years wondering who they were from. No clues, just a card that said, "Will you be my valentine? Love, ???"
So I stand by my invitation that you are more than welcome to post anonymous comments on my blog. Just know that it may drive me nuts for years as I wonder who commented!
But then I remembered back to my senior year of high school when someone anonymously gave me a box of Godiva chocolates for Valentine's day. They left them for me in my second period English class. But the kicker was that we had a substitute teacher that day, and she didn't know who left them! All she could tell me is that he was a brunette!
All I know is that they were NOT from the boy I was dating at the time! (And he was not happy when he found out about it!)
It's driven me nuts for years wondering who they were from. No clues, just a card that said, "Will you be my valentine? Love, ???"
So I stand by my invitation that you are more than welcome to post anonymous comments on my blog. Just know that it may drive me nuts for years as I wonder who commented!
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
be the problem
When faced with a bit of writer's block, why not just go ahead and steal from someone else?
So tonight's post comes from Steve Chandler's book "100 Ways to Motivate Yourself." Which I still haven't gotten motivated to finish reading. So I flipped open to a random page and here is our insight for the night:
92. Try becoming the problem
Whatever type of problem you are facing, the most self-motivational exercise I know of is to immediately say to yourself, "I am the problem."
Because once you see yourself as the problem, you can see yourself as the solution.
...
By seeing ourselves as victims of our problems, we lose the power to solve them. We shut down creativity when we declare the source of the trouble to be outside of us. However, once we say, "I am the problem," there is a great power that shifts from the outside to the inside.
...
Unfortunately, our society today is in the habit of thinking the opposite of "I am the problem." Time magazine even ran a cover story called, "A Nation of Finger Pointers," that made a powerful and persuasive case for the fact that we have become a nation of victims who "see the American dream not as striving fulfilled, but as unachieved entitlement."
That there is some good advice. (And yes, I just changed to a southern drawl.)
So tonight's post comes from Steve Chandler's book "100 Ways to Motivate Yourself." Which I still haven't gotten motivated to finish reading. So I flipped open to a random page and here is our insight for the night:
92. Try becoming the problem
Whatever type of problem you are facing, the most self-motivational exercise I know of is to immediately say to yourself, "I am the problem."
Because once you see yourself as the problem, you can see yourself as the solution.
...
By seeing ourselves as victims of our problems, we lose the power to solve them. We shut down creativity when we declare the source of the trouble to be outside of us. However, once we say, "I am the problem," there is a great power that shifts from the outside to the inside.
...
Unfortunately, our society today is in the habit of thinking the opposite of "I am the problem." Time magazine even ran a cover story called, "A Nation of Finger Pointers," that made a powerful and persuasive case for the fact that we have become a nation of victims who "see the American dream not as striving fulfilled, but as unachieved entitlement."
That there is some good advice. (And yes, I just changed to a southern drawl.)
Post Secret
Have you guys ever heard about Post Secret?
"It all began with an idea Frank Warren had for a community art project. He began handing out postcards to strangers and leaving them in public places- asking people to write down a secret they had never told anyone and mail it to him, anonymously."
The idea really took off and he has a website http://postsecret.blogspot.com/
He also put together a few books which is how I heard about him.
Some of the secrets are funny and some are sad.
To give you an example, I just opened to a random page and these are the four secrets (there is art to go with it but you will have to check it out for yourself to see that) on that page:
How I've stopped cutting myself but started plucking my pubic hair out with tweezers instead.
I once wrote an x-rated letter to a boyfriend who broke up with me before I could give it to him.
...I gave it to my next boyfriend. :)
I believe that my dead grandmother watches me with great disappointment every time I masturbate.
i considered pressing statutory rape charges
just so he'd regret breaking my heart.
but then he'd never want me back
I'd say about 90% of the cards are about love (lost or longing) and self-esteem.
It's a great reminder of how we are all just people. Messed up, problem-filled, really awesome people.
Okay, I flipped through the book a little more and came across this one:
Dear Frank,
I have made six postcards all with secrets that I was afraid to tell the one person I tell everything to, my boyfriend. This morning I planned to mail them, but instead I left them on the pillow next to his head while he was sleeping. Ten minutes ago he arrived at my office and asked me to marry him.
I said yes.
Come on, admit that made you smile. How good does it feel to overcome your fears and admit them to the people whose love means the most to you? Or just to the world in general?
Once you admit it and talk to people about your fears (hopes, dreams, worries, etc) they stop being such a huge scary thing in your life.
Here's one more for the road:
I trashed my parents house to look like I had had a party while they were out of town...
... so my mom would think I had friends.
"It all began with an idea Frank Warren had for a community art project. He began handing out postcards to strangers and leaving them in public places- asking people to write down a secret they had never told anyone and mail it to him, anonymously."
The idea really took off and he has a website http://postsecret.blogspot.com/
He also put together a few books which is how I heard about him.
Some of the secrets are funny and some are sad.
To give you an example, I just opened to a random page and these are the four secrets (there is art to go with it but you will have to check it out for yourself to see that) on that page:
How I've stopped cutting myself but started plucking my pubic hair out with tweezers instead.
I once wrote an x-rated letter to a boyfriend who broke up with me before I could give it to him.
...I gave it to my next boyfriend. :)
I believe that my dead grandmother watches me with great disappointment every time I masturbate.
i considered pressing statutory rape charges
just so he'd regret breaking my heart.
but then he'd never want me back
I'd say about 90% of the cards are about love (lost or longing) and self-esteem.
It's a great reminder of how we are all just people. Messed up, problem-filled, really awesome people.
Okay, I flipped through the book a little more and came across this one:
Dear Frank,
I have made six postcards all with secrets that I was afraid to tell the one person I tell everything to, my boyfriend. This morning I planned to mail them, but instead I left them on the pillow next to his head while he was sleeping. Ten minutes ago he arrived at my office and asked me to marry him.
I said yes.
Come on, admit that made you smile. How good does it feel to overcome your fears and admit them to the people whose love means the most to you? Or just to the world in general?
Once you admit it and talk to people about your fears (hopes, dreams, worries, etc) they stop being such a huge scary thing in your life.
Here's one more for the road:
I trashed my parents house to look like I had had a party while they were out of town...
... so my mom would think I had friends.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
dream baby
I love my dreams because they give me a way to experience things that I would never otherwise experience like flying, swimming with whales, being a vampire, etc.
I had a dream last night that I had a baby girl. A beautiful baby girl. Who I loved so much it hurt.
It was so real, so tangible. I'm not sure if that dream was a blessing or a curse.
I had a dream last night that I had a baby girl. A beautiful baby girl. Who I loved so much it hurt.
It was so real, so tangible. I'm not sure if that dream was a blessing or a curse.
wikipedia
So as a way of working through writer's block for this blog, I decided to go visit Wikipedia's homepage.
They have a feature where you can click "random article" and they will just choose one entry from their millions and show it to you. And when they say random, they mean RANDOM. The articles that they showed me were about some sprint canoe person who won the olympics back in the 50s, some terrorists who supplied people with bomb materials and the woman who does the voice of the princess for the Super Mario Brothers cartoon. My life has been greatly enriched, let me tell ya.
I also just searched for myself. It came up empty handed.
Which made me wonder, what would a wikipedia entry about me say anyways?
What would yours say about you?
They have a feature where you can click "random article" and they will just choose one entry from their millions and show it to you. And when they say random, they mean RANDOM. The articles that they showed me were about some sprint canoe person who won the olympics back in the 50s, some terrorists who supplied people with bomb materials and the woman who does the voice of the princess for the Super Mario Brothers cartoon. My life has been greatly enriched, let me tell ya.
I also just searched for myself. It came up empty handed.
Which made me wonder, what would a wikipedia entry about me say anyways?
What would yours say about you?
date a comedian?
Last night I saw an improv comedy show. It was really funny and of course my mind jumped to the thought, "Wouldn't it be fun to date an improv guy? You must just laugh all the time!"
But as I listened to the one guy tell stories of the women in high school that he slept with, I thanked my lucky stars that I'm not dating nor haven't dated a comedian.
When you become intimately involved with someone there is a certain level of trust where you expect them to not go blabbing about it to all their friends, or at least not to a random audience of strangers!
Though, which is worse? To have friends or to have strangers know all the details of your sex life?
I suppose that is a good reason to remain friends with your ex. If you end on bad terms, I feel it is less likely that they will respect your privacy and will have no discretion when it comes to sharing details about you.
We put an awful lot of trust in other people.
But as I listened to the one guy tell stories of the women in high school that he slept with, I thanked my lucky stars that I'm not dating nor haven't dated a comedian.
When you become intimately involved with someone there is a certain level of trust where you expect them to not go blabbing about it to all their friends, or at least not to a random audience of strangers!
Though, which is worse? To have friends or to have strangers know all the details of your sex life?
I suppose that is a good reason to remain friends with your ex. If you end on bad terms, I feel it is less likely that they will respect your privacy and will have no discretion when it comes to sharing details about you.
We put an awful lot of trust in other people.
Monday, May 17, 2010
thank you cards
I hereby declare this week to be International Write a Thank You Card Week.
So get crackin' and go write an unexpected thank you note to someone. Or just send a thank you email if you are feeling lazy.
I am one of those people who could care less about getting a thank you card in return for sending someone a present. I know that is proper etiquette and all, but an expected (and forced) thank you doesn't really count for much. However, a thank you that is sincerely meant and out of the blue can really turn someone's day around.
So write a thank you note. To your friend for being awesome. To your coworker for always listening to you rant. To your past teacher for teaching you something. To your husband for doing the things he always does- let him know you do notice and appreciate it.
Let's get some good karma going.
I received another thank you note this week. I know I blogged about getting one the other day too. This isn't a normal occurrence. Normally I am just happy to get someone who writes "thank you!" on my tip envelope. So to receive an actual card really made my day. And since nobody else is going to do it, I am just going to go ahead and toot my own horn and post what the card said...
Dear Nikki, [they get bonus points for spelling it right!]
Thank you so much for every great massage! I recently had a not so great massage and this has prompted me to thank you for your skill, experience and [they originally wrote "knowlegde" and crossed it out] knowledge (I am so relaxed, I can't spell!)
I hope if you ever find yourself with an opportunity that takes you away from (the name of my spa) you will let me know where I can find you.
Your warm and friendly personality is also appreciated.
Thank you.
Sincerely, (my client)
I think this is the Universe's way of telling me I am in the right job. It made my day. Your turn. Go make someone's day.
So get crackin' and go write an unexpected thank you note to someone. Or just send a thank you email if you are feeling lazy.
I am one of those people who could care less about getting a thank you card in return for sending someone a present. I know that is proper etiquette and all, but an expected (and forced) thank you doesn't really count for much. However, a thank you that is sincerely meant and out of the blue can really turn someone's day around.
So write a thank you note. To your friend for being awesome. To your coworker for always listening to you rant. To your past teacher for teaching you something. To your husband for doing the things he always does- let him know you do notice and appreciate it.
Let's get some good karma going.
I received another thank you note this week. I know I blogged about getting one the other day too. This isn't a normal occurrence. Normally I am just happy to get someone who writes "thank you!" on my tip envelope. So to receive an actual card really made my day. And since nobody else is going to do it, I am just going to go ahead and toot my own horn and post what the card said...
Dear Nikki, [they get bonus points for spelling it right!]
Thank you so much for every great massage! I recently had a not so great massage and this has prompted me to thank you for your skill, experience and [they originally wrote "knowlegde" and crossed it out] knowledge (I am so relaxed, I can't spell!)
I hope if you ever find yourself with an opportunity that takes you away from (the name of my spa) you will let me know where I can find you.
Your warm and friendly personality is also appreciated.
Thank you.
Sincerely, (my client)
I think this is the Universe's way of telling me I am in the right job. It made my day. Your turn. Go make someone's day.
mmmmm
I would love to explain to you just how good cheese is and just how happy it makes me, but there really are no words to describe it.
:)
:)
Sunday, May 16, 2010
the answer is yes
I've been working on my sex ed book again. Whenever I mention it to someone new, I feel like the need to explain that it isn't some sort of dirty how-to manual.
When asked why I am writing it, instead of giving them a million reasons, I typically tell them the story of my friend's boyfriend that inspired me.
My friend and I were laughing at her ex-boyfriend who once asked her if she could pee when she had a tampon in, or if she had to take it out every time she peed.
We thought he was dumb. So I retold that story to some of my male friends and their response surprised me.
Their response typically was, "Well, CAN you?" Yes, fellas, we can pee with a tampon in. It's a totally different hole.
I think there is an extreme lack of knowledge or just misinformation out there.
I think one of my skills is really dumbing things down for people. I'm not trying to reach a population that wants to know all the different Latin terms for body parts or who wants to know which hormones are released during which stage of the reproductive cycle. There are medical text books for that.
I am trying to reach the general population, the not overly educated population, the population that doesn't love to read. Lots of pictures, minimal text while still conveying as much information as possible. It can be done and I am just the woman to do it.
When asked why I am writing it, instead of giving them a million reasons, I typically tell them the story of my friend's boyfriend that inspired me.
My friend and I were laughing at her ex-boyfriend who once asked her if she could pee when she had a tampon in, or if she had to take it out every time she peed.
We thought he was dumb. So I retold that story to some of my male friends and their response surprised me.
Their response typically was, "Well, CAN you?" Yes, fellas, we can pee with a tampon in. It's a totally different hole.
I think there is an extreme lack of knowledge or just misinformation out there.
I think one of my skills is really dumbing things down for people. I'm not trying to reach a population that wants to know all the different Latin terms for body parts or who wants to know which hormones are released during which stage of the reproductive cycle. There are medical text books for that.
I am trying to reach the general population, the not overly educated population, the population that doesn't love to read. Lots of pictures, minimal text while still conveying as much information as possible. It can be done and I am just the woman to do it.
connection?
I've noticed something, the number of hits that my blog gets goes way down on the weekend. It could be that my readers know that I work all weekend and therefore don't post as much on Saturday and Sunday.
My guess, however, is that people really just tend to read my blog when they are at work and don't really want to do work.
Not that I'm complaining. I'm happy that anyone reads my blog at all, whether it is seeking intellectual enlightenment or simply procrastination makes no difference to me.
My guess, however, is that people really just tend to read my blog when they are at work and don't really want to do work.
Not that I'm complaining. I'm happy that anyone reads my blog at all, whether it is seeking intellectual enlightenment or simply procrastination makes no difference to me.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
lakefront lovin'
I gave myself a new goal for the summer. I need to get down to the lakefront at least once every two weeks. I used to go all the time since I lived so close to it and that is where I would work out. Then I moved. Now it is so easy for me just to take the train into the city and walk just from the train to my work and back again. Never seeing anything.
But it is when I start ONLY seeing Chicago via the train that I start not liking living in Chicago. One of the best things about Chicago is the lakefront and I'll be much happier about being here if I actually get my butt down there!
Plus, you never know what you are going to see or who you are going to meet. Like the cute British guy that I talked about leeches with yesterday. Okay, disclaimer, he wasn't really that cute, but anyone with a British accent automatically becomes a heck of a lot cuter in my book.
How great is it that they even put a water fountain lower down for the doggies!?
This looks like chalk but is actually paint. There is a whole section where people have done pictures- some are silly, sweet or sad.
I need to take a real camera with me one of these days instead of just taking photos from my phone.
This was my "thinking spot" the year after I graduated college. Hadn't been there in years.
I was transfixed by the colors that were playing on the water. It was like being in my very own Monet painting.
Again, sorry, poor footage. I was trying to be a little discreet. You know, just your random kids with foam weapons preparing for their debut at Medieval Times!
I'm obsessed with buildings that have names.
Yum! (we've moved on from the lake to bookclub)
We did actually discuss the book a LITTLE. We don't JUST meet to eat and drink!
But who are we kidding? The best part about bookclub is the delicious food and desserts!
My lovely ladies! And Debbie who is coming right along!
(Hmmmm... perhaps I am going to the opposite extreme now of posting too MANY photos?!)
But it is when I start ONLY seeing Chicago via the train that I start not liking living in Chicago. One of the best things about Chicago is the lakefront and I'll be much happier about being here if I actually get my butt down there!
Plus, you never know what you are going to see or who you are going to meet. Like the cute British guy that I talked about leeches with yesterday. Okay, disclaimer, he wasn't really that cute, but anyone with a British accent automatically becomes a heck of a lot cuter in my book.
How great is it that they even put a water fountain lower down for the doggies!?
This looks like chalk but is actually paint. There is a whole section where people have done pictures- some are silly, sweet or sad.
I need to take a real camera with me one of these days instead of just taking photos from my phone.
This was my "thinking spot" the year after I graduated college. Hadn't been there in years.
I was transfixed by the colors that were playing on the water. It was like being in my very own Monet painting.
Again, sorry, poor footage. I was trying to be a little discreet. You know, just your random kids with foam weapons preparing for their debut at Medieval Times!
I'm obsessed with buildings that have names.
Yum! (we've moved on from the lake to bookclub)
We did actually discuss the book a LITTLE. We don't JUST meet to eat and drink!
But who are we kidding? The best part about bookclub is the delicious food and desserts!
My lovely ladies! And Debbie who is coming right along!
(Hmmmm... perhaps I am going to the opposite extreme now of posting too MANY photos?!)
Thursday, May 13, 2010
bedtime rituals
What's one of the favorite things that you remember from your early childhood? If you are like any of my friends you probably answered something to do with your bedtime ritual.
My bedtime ritual was quite simple. I would get ready for bed and once I was in my bed, ready to go to sleep, one of my parents would come in and put their hand on my tummy (over the blankets) and then they would rock me back and forth a little bit while saying "snuggle! snuggle! snuggle!" This all lasted approximately five seconds, but I REFUSED to go to bed if someone didn't come "snuggle me." While this may seem like a really random thing, which I admit, it is, I hated being tucked in, and to this day don't like the top sheet to be tucked in, so this made more sense.
I apparently was also read to A LOT! But I don't remember that. I just remember the snuggling.
I had a friend whose mom used to blow him a kiss and he got to choose what flavor the kiss was that night. Sometimes strawberry, sometimes chocolate, etc. How precious is that?
What about you? Did you have a favorite bedtime ritual? Do you do one now with your kids?
My bedtime ritual was quite simple. I would get ready for bed and once I was in my bed, ready to go to sleep, one of my parents would come in and put their hand on my tummy (over the blankets) and then they would rock me back and forth a little bit while saying "snuggle! snuggle! snuggle!" This all lasted approximately five seconds, but I REFUSED to go to bed if someone didn't come "snuggle me." While this may seem like a really random thing, which I admit, it is, I hated being tucked in, and to this day don't like the top sheet to be tucked in, so this made more sense.
I apparently was also read to A LOT! But I don't remember that. I just remember the snuggling.
I had a friend whose mom used to blow him a kiss and he got to choose what flavor the kiss was that night. Sometimes strawberry, sometimes chocolate, etc. How precious is that?
What about you? Did you have a favorite bedtime ritual? Do you do one now with your kids?
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
random photos from my life
Didn't I make a New Year's Resolution that I was going to include more pictures in this blog? I think I have included pictures a total of four times this year. That needs to change. So here we go....
This is a picture of a crazy tree in my neighborhood. Notice how the branches go straight up? That's insane! How does it do that? Reminds me of a giant pitch fork.
I saw this ad on a Domino's pizza box. Really? That's your new ad campaign? I'm sort of embarrassed for you, Domino's.
This was a picture of some ladies in Morocco who were balancing lit candles on top of their head. I took the picture to show my friend Emily who has this amazing talent of being able to balance things on her head. But the picture was from Jessica Simpson's Price of Beauty tv show which I had to watch just so I can make fun of it. Thankfully, she was just as annoying as I suspected, and I watched two episodes back-to-back which is why I felt the need to drink so much wine last night.
This is the view from my front window. Isn't it pretty? This is my favorite time of the year. Everything is just so green!
I've become obsessed with drinking fruit smoothies. So easy and delicious and good for you. I just mix some fat free yogurt, a banana or two and some frozen berries in a blender and voila! I ran out of my usual strawberries and blueberries so I tried some raspberries. It makes for a much tarter smoothie and though you can't tell from this pic, it is a BEAUTIFUL color which made me very happy.
My sister was wondering if these were any good so I decided I would try them and report back to her. They are quick and easy and a simple way to get my veggies in for the day. The veggies themselves weren't bad, but I didn't love the sauce they were in. Still, they were edible. The packaging makes me a little sad though. Why not just call it, "For losers, who have to eat by themselves"?
That was a sad one to end on. Oh well, since I am feeling happy, I don't mind if that seems sad. When I am sad, I would have to change that to something more positive to try and stop myself from being sad. That's okay, I can eat my veggies for one and like it!
So those are the random photos from my life. I will try to stick to my promise of having more photos in my blog. And I will try to make them more exciting than these!
This is a picture of a crazy tree in my neighborhood. Notice how the branches go straight up? That's insane! How does it do that? Reminds me of a giant pitch fork.
I saw this ad on a Domino's pizza box. Really? That's your new ad campaign? I'm sort of embarrassed for you, Domino's.
This was a picture of some ladies in Morocco who were balancing lit candles on top of their head. I took the picture to show my friend Emily who has this amazing talent of being able to balance things on her head. But the picture was from Jessica Simpson's Price of Beauty tv show which I had to watch just so I can make fun of it. Thankfully, she was just as annoying as I suspected, and I watched two episodes back-to-back which is why I felt the need to drink so much wine last night.
This is the view from my front window. Isn't it pretty? This is my favorite time of the year. Everything is just so green!
I've become obsessed with drinking fruit smoothies. So easy and delicious and good for you. I just mix some fat free yogurt, a banana or two and some frozen berries in a blender and voila! I ran out of my usual strawberries and blueberries so I tried some raspberries. It makes for a much tarter smoothie and though you can't tell from this pic, it is a BEAUTIFUL color which made me very happy.
My sister was wondering if these were any good so I decided I would try them and report back to her. They are quick and easy and a simple way to get my veggies in for the day. The veggies themselves weren't bad, but I didn't love the sauce they were in. Still, they were edible. The packaging makes me a little sad though. Why not just call it, "For losers, who have to eat by themselves"?
That was a sad one to end on. Oh well, since I am feeling happy, I don't mind if that seems sad. When I am sad, I would have to change that to something more positive to try and stop myself from being sad. That's okay, I can eat my veggies for one and like it!
So those are the random photos from my life. I will try to stick to my promise of having more photos in my blog. And I will try to make them more exciting than these!
garbage
Nooooooooooooo!
Don't you just hate it when you throw something REALLY messy into the tall, white kitchen trash can and as it leaves your hand and is sailing through the air you remember that you forgot to replace the garbage bag when you took out the garbage this morning!?!
Don't you just hate it when you throw something REALLY messy into the tall, white kitchen trash can and as it leaves your hand and is sailing through the air you remember that you forgot to replace the garbage bag when you took out the garbage this morning!?!
experiment
I must say, I did amuse myself (and a few others) last night.
I decided to do an experiment where I would make a comment on every single post that was on my Facebook homepage. This was actually a lot harder than it looked. And I only did a couple before I gave up.
On one of the posts it said that my friend Leah had just become friends with this guy Paul. I haven't seen Leah in years and I have no idea who Paul is but I wrote, "That's awesome!"
Which, of course, confused the heck out of Leah and she wrote "I'm confused... do you guys know each other?"
Nope. I was just drunk.
Anywho, I got a friend request from said friend Paul this morning that I would have just ignored but you know how you can send a message when you send a friend request? Yeah, his message said, "This can be awesome."
Cracked me up! :)
I decided to do an experiment where I would make a comment on every single post that was on my Facebook homepage. This was actually a lot harder than it looked. And I only did a couple before I gave up.
On one of the posts it said that my friend Leah had just become friends with this guy Paul. I haven't seen Leah in years and I have no idea who Paul is but I wrote, "That's awesome!"
Which, of course, confused the heck out of Leah and she wrote "I'm confused... do you guys know each other?"
Nope. I was just drunk.
Anywho, I got a friend request from said friend Paul this morning that I would have just ignored but you know how you can send a message when you send a friend request? Yeah, his message said, "This can be awesome."
Cracked me up! :)
hangovers
All I can say is thank goodness for hangovers.
Can you imagine if we didn't get hangovers?
I would get as stupidly drunk as I did last night ALL the time.
But no, I am definitely reminded this morning of why I don't drink like that. Why I shouldn't drink like that. And why I won't be drinking like that again (at least for a while.)
Can you imagine if we didn't get hangovers?
I would get as stupidly drunk as I did last night ALL the time.
But no, I am definitely reminded this morning of why I don't drink like that. Why I shouldn't drink like that. And why I won't be drinking like that again (at least for a while.)
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
drunk
So I got kind of drunk tonight. I admit that I might judge other people for getting randomly drunk on a Tuesday night. But I had a good reason for it... I felt like it.
I had a time when I felt like I might have a problem with drinking (when I dated my lush ass boyfriend Brian) and so I went a couple of months without drinking just to prove to myself that I could do it.
Now I know that I don't have a problem with drinking, I simply like to do it.
But I am a snob. I would rather not drink alcohol at all and just drink water, than drink anything other than good red wine. But that's just me.
Anywho, there was plenty of good red wine on hand tonight, and so I became a bit intoxicated.
Which led to all sorts of fun. Like me sending random emails and IMs to people on Facebook.
Why can't I go outside my comfort zone like this when I am sober?
Will I regret those emails and facebook posts in the morning? Maybe. But maybe not.
Who is drunk Nikki? Is she just the real me trying to get out? Or is she a more obnoxious version of the real me?
It's hard to say.
I do wish I wasn't so damn shy.
Sure, sometimes I have made an ass out of myself, but it's better to make an ass out of myself than to not get to know people at all!
Cheers, y'all! :)
I had a time when I felt like I might have a problem with drinking (when I dated my lush ass boyfriend Brian) and so I went a couple of months without drinking just to prove to myself that I could do it.
Now I know that I don't have a problem with drinking, I simply like to do it.
But I am a snob. I would rather not drink alcohol at all and just drink water, than drink anything other than good red wine. But that's just me.
Anywho, there was plenty of good red wine on hand tonight, and so I became a bit intoxicated.
Which led to all sorts of fun. Like me sending random emails and IMs to people on Facebook.
Why can't I go outside my comfort zone like this when I am sober?
Will I regret those emails and facebook posts in the morning? Maybe. But maybe not.
Who is drunk Nikki? Is she just the real me trying to get out? Or is she a more obnoxious version of the real me?
It's hard to say.
I do wish I wasn't so damn shy.
Sure, sometimes I have made an ass out of myself, but it's better to make an ass out of myself than to not get to know people at all!
Cheers, y'all! :)
rules
There are no rules in life. Not that we know of anyways. There are guidelines given to us by our religions and cultures, but no steadfast rules.
If we don't know the rules, how do we know if we are following them? How do we know if we are living our lives right?
Here was my thought as I was drifting off to sleep last night- What if this really is a game? You know how in video games when you successfully finish one level you get to go to the higher level? What if this is a game and we are on "level: Earth"??
From what I can gather, the rules of the game seem to be this: Get married, raise two children and provide the most stable environment that you can for them.
I've decided that you get bonus points for certain things like graduating from college, having a job that pays more than $75,000 a year and having a beautiful home.
You get deducted points for doing things like getting arrested, being a druggie or starring on a reality TV show.
I mean, if someone were to just write down the rules for us, this whole game would sure make a lot more sense.
Game on.
If we don't know the rules, how do we know if we are following them? How do we know if we are living our lives right?
Here was my thought as I was drifting off to sleep last night- What if this really is a game? You know how in video games when you successfully finish one level you get to go to the higher level? What if this is a game and we are on "level: Earth"??
From what I can gather, the rules of the game seem to be this: Get married, raise two children and provide the most stable environment that you can for them.
I've decided that you get bonus points for certain things like graduating from college, having a job that pays more than $75,000 a year and having a beautiful home.
You get deducted points for doing things like getting arrested, being a druggie or starring on a reality TV show.
I mean, if someone were to just write down the rules for us, this whole game would sure make a lot more sense.
Game on.
Monday, May 10, 2010
I love you, you're perfect, now change
Do you know what one of the nicest things about being single is? I don't feel the need to change anybody. I feel at peace with the world.
That's the difference between a friend and a significant other. You can just accept your friends for who they are. But I don't know a single girl who doesn't want to change her significant other in some way or another.
Usually it is just little stuff like wishing he would take out the trash, say "I love you" without prompting, open up more.
I suppose it is because we are more attached to significant others so how they act affects us more. Or we spend more time with them/ live with them so their actions have more time to grate on us. Or because we have "chosen" to be with them, their actions reflect on us more.
Some of the best advice I've ever gotten is this:
Let them be their own person.
And find someone whose faults you can live with because they aren't going to change after marriage. Marriage does not fix things.
I think that second piece of advice was really important for me to hear. It came from one of my clients a few years back. He was in therapy with his wife who was insecure and jealous. He thought that once he declared his love and married her, proving how committed he was to her, that her fears and jealousy would subside.
But they didn't. Because marriage doesn't change who a person is. If they are insecure and jealous before marriage. They are going to be insecure and jealous after marriage. They will just be jealous of people talking to their husband rather than their boyfriend.
I'm sure I will start dating again at some point and find someone that I love and who drives me crazy. I just hope I can hold onto the piece of the single me who doesn't feel the need to change other people and let that person be who they are, faults and all.
That's the difference between a friend and a significant other. You can just accept your friends for who they are. But I don't know a single girl who doesn't want to change her significant other in some way or another.
Usually it is just little stuff like wishing he would take out the trash, say "I love you" without prompting, open up more.
I suppose it is because we are more attached to significant others so how they act affects us more. Or we spend more time with them/ live with them so their actions have more time to grate on us. Or because we have "chosen" to be with them, their actions reflect on us more.
Some of the best advice I've ever gotten is this:
Let them be their own person.
And find someone whose faults you can live with because they aren't going to change after marriage. Marriage does not fix things.
I think that second piece of advice was really important for me to hear. It came from one of my clients a few years back. He was in therapy with his wife who was insecure and jealous. He thought that once he declared his love and married her, proving how committed he was to her, that her fears and jealousy would subside.
But they didn't. Because marriage doesn't change who a person is. If they are insecure and jealous before marriage. They are going to be insecure and jealous after marriage. They will just be jealous of people talking to their husband rather than their boyfriend.
I'm sure I will start dating again at some point and find someone that I love and who drives me crazy. I just hope I can hold onto the piece of the single me who doesn't feel the need to change other people and let that person be who they are, faults and all.
friends
I was thinking today about the different categories that we have for labeling people.
People don't just fall into either "friends" or "strangers." There are many shades of gray.
We have acquaintances, school-friends, work-friends, people we know from the gym, family-friends, old friends, teammates, friends-of-friends, good friends, best friends, and nowadays we have the new category which is facebook friends.
Some people limit the people that they friend on Facebook to actual good friends of theirs. Other people will friend every single person that they know. The guy that they talked to for ten minutes at the party last night? Yup, he is getting a friend request.
I was looking at some of my friends' profiles and they really run the gamut. I have one friend who only has 21 facebook friends. I have another friend who has over 2,000 friends!
I personally have 386 friends on Facebook. Do I really have 386 friends in my life? No.
I decided to do a little experiment and I went through my list of facebook friends and made a list of how many of them I have had actual contact with in the last two months.
I decided that "contact" would mean either talking on the phone, seeing them face-to-face, writing or receiving a letter or email from them. Writing on their walls did not count. Mass forwarded emails also did not count.
So out of 386 people, how many would you guess I had actual contact with in the last two months?
The answer? 52. That's actually a lot higher than I expected it to be. I thought the number would be more like 20.
I wonder how many of those 2,000 facebook friends has my friend had contact with in the past two months??
People don't just fall into either "friends" or "strangers." There are many shades of gray.
We have acquaintances, school-friends, work-friends, people we know from the gym, family-friends, old friends, teammates, friends-of-friends, good friends, best friends, and nowadays we have the new category which is facebook friends.
Some people limit the people that they friend on Facebook to actual good friends of theirs. Other people will friend every single person that they know. The guy that they talked to for ten minutes at the party last night? Yup, he is getting a friend request.
I was looking at some of my friends' profiles and they really run the gamut. I have one friend who only has 21 facebook friends. I have another friend who has over 2,000 friends!
I personally have 386 friends on Facebook. Do I really have 386 friends in my life? No.
I decided to do a little experiment and I went through my list of facebook friends and made a list of how many of them I have had actual contact with in the last two months.
I decided that "contact" would mean either talking on the phone, seeing them face-to-face, writing or receiving a letter or email from them. Writing on their walls did not count. Mass forwarded emails also did not count.
So out of 386 people, how many would you guess I had actual contact with in the last two months?
The answer? 52. That's actually a lot higher than I expected it to be. I thought the number would be more like 20.
I wonder how many of those 2,000 facebook friends has my friend had contact with in the past two months??
Saturday, May 8, 2010
american
These are some pics that I took of myself tonight because I thought it might be helpful for this story to see what the woman was seeing...
So I was waiting on the el platform today on my way to work and this woman walked up to me and asked me something. I didn't hear her but she seemed to actually be a normal person (not a crazy person, like my stories usually revolve around) so I said, "What?" and she repeated her question.
She asked me, "Are you American?"
Huh?
I could tell she wasn't asking about my patriotism, but about my nationality.
With my backpack and big clunky gym shoes I was feeling decidedly American looking.
So I told her that I was indeed American. She told me that I looked exotic and foreign.
I explained that I was a mutt which gave me that look.
She wanted to know what nationalities I was.
And this is the part that I always find so funny. I told her that I was 50% Polish, 25% German and then a little bit Bohemian (Czech), French-Canadian and Native American.
Without fail when I say "Native American" that is when everyone nods and let's out a satisfied "ahhhh!" as if that was what they were looking for and that is what explains it.
But the thing is, I look exactly like my mother who is 100% POLISH!!!! These cheekbones have absolutely nothing to do with being part Native American, they are entirely from being Eastern European!
And then she corrected me and told me that I shouldn't say Native American, I should say "indigenous."
I was tempted to tell her that being Native American, I could call myself whatever I wanted, but she was a nice lady and she followed it up by saying, "Whatever you are, you are beautiful, in case nobody has told you today."
Ahhh! That was nice. Since I'm not dating right now, I really don't get compliments so I will take them wherever I can get them- whether it be four-year olds or random ladies on the train! :)
Thursday, May 6, 2010
brilliant thoughts for the day
I work with a lot of vegetarians. One of my coworkers was eating a homemade pasta dish today that had a meat substitute in it.
I decided that fake meat should henceforth be called "faux-tein" like faux protein.
Whatever, I think it's catchy.
Also I was eating a little snack this afternoon and came up with this humdinger of a joke...
Why did the mellons finally decide to have a big wedding?
Because their parents told them they cantaloupe!
I decided that fake meat should henceforth be called "faux-tein" like faux protein.
Whatever, I think it's catchy.
Also I was eating a little snack this afternoon and came up with this humdinger of a joke...
Why did the mellons finally decide to have a big wedding?
Because their parents told them they cantaloupe!
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
post workout
I don't smell good.
That's right... I smell GREAT!
Does anybody else love the way they smell after a hardcore workout? Not like B.O., but just serious sweat?
Oh, I'm the only one?
Hmmpfh.
Fine, I'll go shower.
That's right... I smell GREAT!
Does anybody else love the way they smell after a hardcore workout? Not like B.O., but just serious sweat?
Oh, I'm the only one?
Hmmpfh.
Fine, I'll go shower.
bad decision?
By the way, I decided to sit here and eat ice cream this afternoon instead of going running. Just thought you should know.
thoughts, thoughts, thoughts
Do you know what is amazing? How many thoughts you can have in a thirty second time span. I sat here thinking about what I should write which led to me thinking about my novel and how I wish I knew some real writers. That led me to thinking about this girl Stephanie that I went to high school with and how she is a real writer (had a book of poems published) and how she also has the same last name as a girl I work with and I wonder if there is any way that they are related. And then the scene from Monty Python's "Holy Grail" started going through my head where the guy is going through town with his cart and yells "Bring out your dead!"
And then I started thinking about the scene from "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves" where they are standing at the gate of the city and are searching everyone who comes in and keep repeating, "No blades, no bows, leave your weapons here." Which wouldn't be much of a line except they do it in a fun voice.
And then I was thinking about my butler's pantry.
And then... and then...
And basically I had a million different thoughts in a thirty second time span which makes you wonder how we can ever just focus on one thing. And those are only the thoughts that I was aware of. That doesn't even touch on all those impulses and signals that got sent to my brain that I tucked away and just dealt with instead of consciously acknowledging like "hey, you are sitting on a chair" and "now, hands, move this way to type these letters."
It's just mind boggling.
Which leads us to our quote of the day (that was on a poster in the AP physics classroom in high school) "If our brains were simple enough for us to understand them, we wouldn't be able to."
What are you thinking about right now?
And then I started thinking about the scene from "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves" where they are standing at the gate of the city and are searching everyone who comes in and keep repeating, "No blades, no bows, leave your weapons here." Which wouldn't be much of a line except they do it in a fun voice.
And then I was thinking about my butler's pantry.
And then... and then...
And basically I had a million different thoughts in a thirty second time span which makes you wonder how we can ever just focus on one thing. And those are only the thoughts that I was aware of. That doesn't even touch on all those impulses and signals that got sent to my brain that I tucked away and just dealt with instead of consciously acknowledging like "hey, you are sitting on a chair" and "now, hands, move this way to type these letters."
It's just mind boggling.
Which leads us to our quote of the day (that was on a poster in the AP physics classroom in high school) "If our brains were simple enough for us to understand them, we wouldn't be able to."
What are you thinking about right now?
Monday, May 3, 2010
puff
So I was out rollerblading and my ipod was on shuffle and it came across the song Puff the Magic Dragon.
And as I was listening to the words, I got really bothered. Perhaps the song is just a metaphor and not meant to be taken quite so literally, but whatever...
A dragon lives forever but not so little boys
Painted wings and giant rings make way for other toys.
One grey night it happened, Jackie Paper came no more
And Puff that mighty dragon, he ceased his fearless roar.
Um, who outgrows having a dragon for a friend?!? Um, nobody! Cuz that would be the coolest thing EVER!
So that really is bothering me.
And as I was listening to the words, I got really bothered. Perhaps the song is just a metaphor and not meant to be taken quite so literally, but whatever...
A dragon lives forever but not so little boys
Painted wings and giant rings make way for other toys.
One grey night it happened, Jackie Paper came no more
And Puff that mighty dragon, he ceased his fearless roar.
Um, who outgrows having a dragon for a friend?!? Um, nobody! Cuz that would be the coolest thing EVER!
So that really is bothering me.
ugh
Why did I get out of bed yesterday? I knew it was a bad idea. I sure as hell am not going to make that same mistake today!
Saturday, May 1, 2010
weeds
Do you know what I just did? I just spent half an hour picking dandelions in our front yard. Not for fun. But because we are the jerks- the one lawn on the block that isn't professionally taken care of and pesticided.
So we have weeds. Which didn't really bother me. But then I noticed that all these nice lawns around us are starting to get weeds because our weeds are spreading. Which kind of sucks and I don't want the neighbors to hate us so when I came home from work today and saw a bunch of big fluffy white dandelions getting ready to spread their seeds, I said, "Hell, no! Not on my watch!" And I grabbed the plastic bag that was on our porch and filled it up.
I didn't do a great job (didn't get them out by the roots or anything) but that should at least slow down their spread by a couple of days.
I will admit that I definitely stopped working as hard after I accidentally stuck my hand down a rabbit hole!
Yeah, kind of freaked out about that one.
Lawns are stupid. I mean, yeah, I love them and all, but they are soooo much work and so not as nature intended. We need to get some pet sheep or something. Is that even legal here? I hope so.
So we have weeds. Which didn't really bother me. But then I noticed that all these nice lawns around us are starting to get weeds because our weeds are spreading. Which kind of sucks and I don't want the neighbors to hate us so when I came home from work today and saw a bunch of big fluffy white dandelions getting ready to spread their seeds, I said, "Hell, no! Not on my watch!" And I grabbed the plastic bag that was on our porch and filled it up.
I didn't do a great job (didn't get them out by the roots or anything) but that should at least slow down their spread by a couple of days.
I will admit that I definitely stopped working as hard after I accidentally stuck my hand down a rabbit hole!
Yeah, kind of freaked out about that one.
Lawns are stupid. I mean, yeah, I love them and all, but they are soooo much work and so not as nature intended. We need to get some pet sheep or something. Is that even legal here? I hope so.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)