Happy New Year's!

Oh boy, Mike just got his first iphone. He's over on the other couch playing with ringtones. It's really cute to see someone play with their first iphone... remembering the joy of your own first time.

So I was thinking about NYE. I hate NYE usually. It never lives up to the hype. And this year I was going to do it right and we were going to go have a four course meal at one of my favorite restaurants. But I've felt like crap for two days and am not up to it so Mike is cooking for me here. That, of course, is one of the perks of dating an amazing chef... dinner at home is anything other than ordinary and is usually better than most restaurants. Among other things I believe that duck rilette is on the menu for tonight. Yum.

So NYE is a great time for reflections and thinking about the future. So how was 2011? It was pretty awesome. I mean, at the moment I am exhausted and feel like crap... but the majority of the year was pretty good.

I was looking at my list of goals from last year to see how many I had accomplished. This was last year's list:

Take a writing course
Go to Paris
Move back into the city
Get engaged
Go back to Northfield for my ten-year college reunion
Eat gyro pizza in Northfield
Get out of debt
Quit my job or reduce my hours and get some other sort of new (non massage related) job
Take Tai Chi/ Qi-Gong classes
Learn sign language
Throw a Star Wars themed party
Celebrate my mom being healthy and beating cancer
Play on a soccer team
Play on a volleyball team
Fit into size 8 jeans
Take a strip-tease class
Make a video of me and my puppets
Smile every single day
Learn hypnosis
Have my family get a dog when my folks move back (this really might happen!!!)
Remain injury free and healthy in general
Learn acupuncture and Chinese medicine
Learn how to sew
Reduce my sugar and meat and alcohol intake (I've already cut out soda pop!!)
Read 50 books

I accomplished only ten of them. (the ones in red) Pathetic.

Now this year I could make a list of things that I actually KNOW I could accomplish and then I could feel better about being able to knock things off my list, but screw it, go big or go home.

Goal list for 2012

- do another cleanse

- eat vegetarian 80% of the time (with Mike cooking for me it is hard to do it all the time but with the new vegan restaurant that I am in love with by my work it will help)

- go out with my friends more

- write five pages a week

- introduce Pookie to Michael

- take fencing classes

- take swing dance lessons

- keep our bonsai tree alive

- get a new high score in Yahtzee (beat 640)

- learn how to use adobe photoshop

- get engaged/married

- take at least two yoga classes a week

- get down to a size 8

- visit a new city and hopefully state and extra hopefully country

- get a dog

- move into a new apartment

- go to Paris

- work harder/ care more about my appearance

- read two non-fiction books for every fiction book I read

- celebrate New Year's Eve 2012

- clear out my parent's attic

- drink less alcohol

- visit Sara's apartment (it's so weird to me that I have a super good friend whose apartment I have never seen)

- have more people over to my apartment

- do High Tea more

- win our volleyball league again

- work on my vertical jump and gain at least six inches

- stop procrastinating

- finish my to-do lists

- vacuum more

- do ten push-ups a day minimum

- work on keeping a positive outlook

- be a positive influence- make the people around me happy and see the best in them

- show my good side to everyone- I typically reserve it for the people who I feel are worthy or that I feel safe around but if I was my "best friend" self to everyone, I think it would dramatically change my relationships

- have more self-confidence in my writing

- enter at least four writing contests

- rock on!

holiday newsletter 2011- sorry it's a long one

It's that time again... time to post the holiday newsletter that I am too cheap and lazy to send out!

This has been one of the best years of my life. Who knew that being in my 30s would rock so much? I know I learned a lot and grew a lot in my 20s but I would much rather skip the 20s and have two helpings of my 30s.

What has been so great about this year?

Travel!

I love to travel and don't do nearly enough of it. I took four main trips this year. The first was to Minnesota for my ten year reunion. That was a blast. I am very lucky that I got to go to Carleton. And I want to thank Matt Siarny again for placing the application in my hand my senior year of high school and telling me that I should go there. He was right. And I'm very thankful for Facebook for letting me keep up with all the amazing people from there. You guys all rock.

My old roomies, Kip and Aaron

Gyro pizza! My main reason for going to reunion!

I'm so thankful I've been able to keep my vow to see my Pookie at least once a year!

My second trip was to North Carolina which was exciting for numerous reasons. I got to meet my favorite author, Orson Scott Card. I got to make some neat friends. I learned a lot about writing. I went to a new state. And I got to spend a lot of quality time with my mom. My favorite moment of the trip might very well have been when I got back to the room after a very long day in class and my mom and I ordered freshly baked chocolate chip cookies and milk from room service at 10 PM.

We made a quick (three hour) detour to go see the Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC. Worth the trip. A castle in America. Crazy to think people really lived like that.

My boyfriend Michael and I took a mini getaway to Michigan for some wine tasting. Going on your first vacation together is always an important step in a relationship. You are together 24/7 for multiple days. How will that go down? Luckily it made us more in love than ever. And we found a new appreciation for Michigan wines.

My last trip was more recent- just down to Atlanta for Thanksgiving. My sister-in-law made her famous "pink stuff" dessert. I don't know exactly what's in it and I don't care, it makes me happy and that is all that matters!

My niece, Ella, and I had a blast in the crawl spaces behind the aquariums at the Atlanta aquarium.

My family's house in Oak Park went through MONTHS of construction. My parents moved back home. Everything was chaos but it turned out great.

The upstairs kitchen during the gutting stage.

The downstairs kitchen almost finished. The boys cooking dinner for the ladies.

I, of course, don't get to enjoy the new kitchens and bathrooms much since I've moved out of that house and now live in Logan Square. I won't lie. The apartment is small and far away from everything. But there are some perks, like the personal chef and the awesome park across the street. It's home.

My mom's health isn't great. She had a clean bill of health at her last check up- cancer free! Well, as clean as it can be. She still takes like 20 pills a day and has zero energy. But the way I think about it, I would rather her have a body that doesn't work that great and still have a good mind, than have a healthy body and be completely senile/ have alzheimers. I'm taking what I can get and am enjoying spending time with her.

Luckily soccer and volleyball keep me going out to Oak Park so I usually see them once a week. And speaking of volleyball... we won the league and regained our title of champs! As for soccer... well, this season didn't go quite so well.

I still don't see my friends nearly as much as I would like. Partly because of busy schedules but mostly due to laziness. I am making that my New Year's resolution so expect to be hounded by me soon!

I continued to give the occasional volunteer massage for women diagnosed with cancer and I realize that I am happiest when I am giving and when I am creating. So those are my major goals for 2012.

I'm the happiest and healthiest I've ever been. I love you guys! I hope we all become the people we want to be in 2012!

vegan food

I discovered the best vegan restaurant EVER. Native Foods Cafe. Amazing. When people hear vegan they think healthy. And bland and tasteless. Well this place proved them all wrong.

First of all, I got a side of the chili cheese fries which were far and away better than any normal chili cheese fries that I have ever had. In fact, all their food is so good that you could trick people into thinking it was normal food.

Which, technically, it is, but most people have a stigma against vegans.

This place makes it so easy to not eat meat. I think I might become a regular. (and become more regular in the process! ha!)

dumb girls

So today's funnies come from Reader's Digest. I particularly like the last one.

Sometimes men don't date women for their IQs. Here are some examples:

-Today, my girlfriend asked me if my grandmother had any kids.

-My girlfriend and I went out to dinner. We were going to get there 30 minutes early, so I told her to call to see if they could bump us up. The reservation was under my name. After being with me for a year, she didn't know how to say my last name.

-It took my girlfriend almost a full season of The Office to realize it wasn't a reality show.

And then just because I ran across this one yesterday:

I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb... and I also know that I'm not blonde. -Dolly Parton

pizza

Tonight's the big night... my first time eating junk food since the cleanse. I get to eat delicious, yummy Lou Malnati's pizza tonight.

On the one hand, I'm super excited because it is delicious.

On the other hand, I've been feeling sooo good since the cleanse... I don't want to ruin that by eating heavy food with lots of carbs, meat and cheese.

But I have a most excellent night ahead of me, Mike and I are eating pizza, watching Legend (the 1985 fantasy movie starring Tom Cruise) and then we are decorating our tree.

Mike really wanted a tree but since our apartment is about the size of a postage stamp, we decided against it. But he really wanted it. He even mentioned maybe just getting a wreath instead. "We could hang ornaments on it!" It was sad. So I surprised him last night by getting a tree. A small one, which is sitting on top of our unused dining room table. It's his first real Christmas tree ever.

The man who sold it to me was very impressed because I picked it out in under 30 seconds. He said it was the fastest he has ever seen someone choose a tree.

Sorry, my life is not that exciting right now, so this is what I blog about.

food

Who had any idea that food could taste this good?

All I've had so far is vegetable soup- just some parsnips, celery, carrots and veggie broth (though I'm sure Mike added some spices because it is Mike after all) and it is mind blowingly good.

You want to enjoy food again like nobody's business? Just go seven days without eating it!

We've been planning out all of the wonderful food that we can't wait to eat again! Yum!

being a giver

I had two things happen yesterday that made me think about giving. The first was a conversation with my coworker who has a really cheap friend. She babysits for this friend but is always worried about how the friend will react to things. For example, if there was just a smidge of orange juice left, she would always ask before drinking it instead of just drinking it. The husband when she asked said, "Of course, just drink it, you don't have to ask." But she knew that the wife/her friend might very well care. My coworker just upgraded to a new bagless vacuum and gave them her old (which is still relatively new) one with extra bags because they were in need of one. They then went to a movie later that day where parking was $5 and her friend asked if she had the $2.50 in cash to pay for my coworker's half. She said she didn't have cash on her and her friend said, "That's okay, I know you're good for it." My coworker replied, "Seeing as how I just gave you a vacuum, I think we can call it even."

Now you can nitpick about points in this story, like the fact that if her friend drove and was therefore paying for gas, that my coworker should pay for the parking. And there are always going to be people who don't contribute whether because they are cheap or because they are struggling financially.

But I think when you start looking at being even and who owes who what, it is a recipe for disaster. This goes for money but also for time and help.

Since not that many people read this blog, I think I am safe from copyright laws and it is okay for my to go ahead and steal some paragraphs out of Steve Chandler's book "50 Ways to Create Great Relationships" about being a servant.

When the serving of others is done in a happy spirit, relationships blossom immediately.

However, when service is performed in the mood of self-sacrifice, the service is wasted. Anything we do out of a sense of obligation is not a gift at all. We're better off not even doing it.

Obligation does not build relationships, it wears them out.

How do you like it when you realize that someone who has done something for you did it out of a sense of obligation?

If I've enjoyed a wonderful romantic evening with my wife and tell her so the next morning, how would I feel if she turned to me and said, "Oh, I did it because I felt obligated. It was my duty."

Obligation does not create great relationships. Voluntary and creative service does.

Serve someone else's purpose. Find out when another person needs and provide it. Just for the fun of it.
...
Service of others has gotten a weird reputation these days. We seem to have lost the fun and spontaneity that can be associated with it. Somehow we now associate it with dreary servitude and shuffling around- a kind of subtle inferiority.

In truth, when service is provided with the right spirit, it's a pure joy. The endless energy and spirit that my friend Steve shows is proof enough for me. I never see him happier than when he's helping someone out.
...
Service is the opposite of inferiority to another person because in service the other person can't touch you. You are so high above your emotional center, you can't be intimidated. When your focus is on service, you are in the most spirited part of your being and it gives you the feeling of having wings.

People used to ask Mother Teresa how she found the inner strength to live such a life of self-sacrifice. All of her selfless service to the poor seemed so unimaginable to the journalists who interviewed her. However, as she often said in her interviews, "If people knew how much joy I was experiencing, they wouldn't consider this to be a sacrifice."

People who serve are way beyond the opinion of others. They are not worried about what other people think of them. They are too busy serving. And, as my mother used to annoy me by saying, "Busy hands are happy hands."

As part of my cleanse this week, I've been trying to implement this more in my life and I will say, it really works. Most of the things that I have been doing are little and don't cost me a thing: sending ecards, washing other people's dirty dishes in the break room sink, sitting and talking to a coworker who usually drives me a little nuts, replacing Mike's burnt out lightbulb, helping my mom unpack boxes. And even the ones that did cost me money like buying a new clock for the break room, were completely worth the small price.

And as if I needed more proof of this, I had my favorite client Tilney last night. She is a giver. What she gives off is energy and happiness. The whole spa cheers up when we know that she is coming in. My boss leaned her head out of her office on Thursday and said, "Guess who is coming in on Sunday to see you, Nikki? TILNEY!!!"

I want to be a person who has an effect on people like that.

After my massage with her I was in a great mood and ran into Nina in the break room. Nina had worked on her a few months ago and had said to me then, "Nikki, I just worked on one of your regular clients, Tilney. She is amazing." So I told Nina that Tilney had just come in and did she remember her. And Nina said, "Of course I remember her. I still have the tip envelope she made for me up on my fridge." Tilney instead of just filling out the To and From on the tip envelope, likes to embellish it and write things like "Goddess Nikki" and "statues should be erected in your honor" and things like that. More important than the money, I look forward to seeing what she writes on the envelope.

So as I was leaving yesterday I asked at the front desk if I had any tips and Justine said, "Just the cutest tip ever!" with a huge grin and hands me the envelope from Tilney.

It just a little piece of old ribbon but I couldn't stop smiling on my way home.

I'm going to try to give some smiles and spread some sunshine this month.

Love you!

guilt free cleanse

Do you know what is the best part about the cleanse?

The total lack of guilt.

You are supposed to take it easy, so if I don't exercise that day, I don't have to feel guilty.

I am supposed to drink between 6-12 glasses of this stuff, and I usually feel full with 8 so I don't have to feel guilty about over or under doing it.

And I don't have food guilt. Maybe that is more of a girl thing, and now mind you, I love and enjoy my food but afterwards there is the feeling of guilt... once I am full and my cravings have stopped, I think to myself, "Damn it Nik, you should have had the salad instead of the bacon blue cheeseburger."

But with this cleanse, I don't have to feel guilty.

That's wonderful.

I also don't get to eat, which is not as wonderful, but hey, only 6 days left!

And I'm hoping with my new found appreciation for food and moderation that after the cleanse I will have more self control and WILL actually order the salad instead of the burger.

The only thing that I dislike about the cleanse is that my ankles are killing me. Why? Possibly because of volleyball last night. More likely that they always hurt but that I usually take some Advil- which I can't do while on the cleanse- and so now I am really feeling it instead of masking it the way I always do. Is this a good thing? Doesn't feel like a good thing. Maybe the bad stuff in my ankles is being cleansed out and that is why I am feeling it? I'm going to go ahead and tell myself that to help me get through this.

Love you guys!

crashing

I was having an unbelievably delightful day.

Then around 5 PM I just crashed. Luckily Mike is as tired as I am so we agreed to sit on our asses tonight. Part of that sitting on our asses involves me doing my Christmas shopping- which is almost always done via internet these days.

And shopping for others led to me looking for things for myself (just looking) and it brings up my most annoying pet peeve in the world... some jackass decided to only make whole sizes for women's shoes starting at size 9.

Some brands carry 9.5 which is what I wear, but the majority don't. You get 7, 7.5, 8, 8.5, 9 and then jump to 10!!! Grrrrrrr!

That's my excuse for not wearing cute shoes. Poop heads. That and the ones I loved today were $117 which I can't justify for shoes that I will wear maybe five times a year.

Nikki, you don't need stuff. Remember that. You don't need stuff.

Yeah, yeah, I know. But sometimes I WOULD actually like to look cute. I mean, duh, I am always adorable and I know that but it would be nice to be girly and cute sometimes too. Why does it have to be so darn expensive? And it really is... because even when I find an adorable dress that I would be willing to splurge $109 on, it doesn't stop there... because then you need tights and shoes and a sweater and jewelry and if you are really going for it, a coat to match.

Sigh.

I guess I'll stick to my t-shirts until I win the lottery.

day 4 of the cleanse

Hello, welcome to day 4 of the master cleanse. I feel like a newborn baby. I swear my whole day revolves around eating and pooping.

And by "eating" I of course mean, drinking the cleanse solution. Which is still quite yummy. Mike got sick of it after day one, but I am doing okay. Day two was the worst for cravings. I wanted some french fries like nobody's business. Yesterday I didn't bring enough of the solution with me out to Oak Park and I got EXHAUSTED from playing volleyball. So of course now my mom is all worried about me doing this. However, when I do it correctly and actually drink enough of the stuff I am fine.

Plus last night I had a dream that I befriended Tom Hanks, which may or may not have anything to do with being on the cleanse but was still pretty damn awesome.

Mike wants to go to the independent movie theater tonight and watch a film about El Bulli, one of the best restaurants in the world. That's brilliant- go watch a movie about delicious, incredible food while we are on the cleanse?!? What can I say, we are gluttons for punishment.