a spot of tea, perhaps?

I had a client last night that cracked me up.

First of all, she was late for the appointment. Not like, really, really late. But it was supposed to start at 4:20 and at 4:20 she was still putzing around in the steam room or something. At least I assume that is what she was doing because at 4:25 when she bothered coming over she was bright red and covered in sweat.

So finally I get her in the room and start talking to her. Is something bothering her? What does she want to work on? Is she just looking for relaxation? Yadda, yadda, yadda. Okay, let's start face down, I'll be back in a couple of minutes. Do you have any questions?

Now, normally when I ask people if they have any questions, the answer is no. Occasionally someone will ask if it is okay for them to keep their underwear on. (It is.) But I've just covered EVERYTHING, so really, I just do it more as a formality. So I ask my darling client if she has any questions and she goes, "Oh yeah, could you go get me some tea?"

"What?" I must have misheard her. Or she is kidding, right?

"Could you go get me some tea?"

I can only imagine the look on my face. You know that in approximately 90 seconds you are going to be laying face down getting a massage, right? And do I look like your bitch?

Apparently I did, because I asked "What kind of tea?"

"Oh, any kind is fine. But lots of honey."

"Sure thing."

Ah, clients. You never cease to amuse me.