doctor

Do other people have the same aversion to going to the doctor that I do?

Doctors are supposed to make you feel better. Instead they just stress me out.

Why is that?

For starters, I worry about how much my insurance will cover. Will going to the doctor set me back $1000?

And then I am worried that they will tell me I am a hypochondriac.

This summer when I went to the hospital because I was having trouble breathing, they just gave me a chill-the-fuck-out pill and chalked it up to a panic attack. To be fair, I told them that I might be having a panic attack.

However, the problem has persisted. For months. And not when I am panicky. I will just be riding the el, reading my book and I will swallow and I will feel like I am choking.

I'm no doctor, but that's not normal.

It's possibly allergies. And so I am going to go see an allergist.

And it is possibly something going on in my throat. I haven't had a sore throat so I don't think it is my tonsils. But who knows?

What's the worst that can happen? They find nothing wrong with me and charge me lots of money?

Um, yeah, that IS the worst that can happen!

I suppose them discovering that I have throat cancer would be worse, but at least then I wouldn't be crazy.

Which is better, to have cancer or be crazy?

I don't really want either.

But it is time to suck it up and go see a doctor.

Whenever I am in situations like this I think of my friends and family. If they were in a similar situation, what would I tell them to do? Exactly. Go to the friggin' doctor already!